Fallout 3 - 10/07/08

From the makers of Elder Scrolls: Obilvion a post apocalyptic RPG. OMG doesn't even become to cover it. Fallout 3 this Fall. Boo-yah.

Minute Maid Cherry Limeade is not made of people.

Minute Maid Cherry Limeade is crack. While I haven't begun to steal TVs, mug old ladies, or sell myself for a carton I am not ruling out the possibility.

I picked up two cartons from Kroger's this afternoon. They were on sale 10 cartons for $10 but Amanda would only let me get two. Earlier I was cutting the stuff with iced tea but now I've moved to the straight stuff.

You have to keep in mind that I am still relatively new to sobriety and limeade(s). Previously lime was something you put in something clear, refreshing, and alcoholic or on food. The one real bitch about sobriety - besides me - is the fact that I am always thirsty. Water gets pretty boring pretty fast. Iced tea is good if strong enough. Iced coffee...well I get a little jittery after the second pot of coffee. There's just something about limeade and Cherry Limeade in particular that just hits the spot. Kind of like Pink Grapefruit, kind of like Limeade, kind of like crack. All magic.

When there's no more room in Hell...

wear the dead as jewelry!

I saw this ad on the side of imdb and had to click on it. My morbid curiousity would not be ignored.

Yes folks. LifeGem creates gems out of your loved one's bones! LifeGem is made of people! Pets too - if that's your preference.

Maybe I am just overly sensitive but this is pretty creepy. Not as creepy as wearing a lady suit and slow dancing to "I Only Have Eyes For You" but still. This is morbid, weird, and just vaguely ghoulish. They range in price from only $3500 to a mere $20,000. At least turning people into meat pies yields an affordable - and tasty -product.

Momento Mori are one thing but turning people into bling? This is one gem that is truly outrageous.

Batman: Gotham Knight (2008)

Batman: Gotham Knight could have been a "Can't wait to see the new Batman movie! Need Bat-fix!" but it most certainly wasn't. I downloaded it because I was bored and it's usually a safe bet that some thing animated from the DC Universe will be pretty solid.

B: GK is made up six different shorts by six different animation crews. Amanda quipped that it's kind of like a Batman Animatrix. She's not wrong. Several of the animators worked on that as well. It also has some similar themes, etc., etc. I think The Animatrix kicked ass and B: GK does as well. It always makes me happy to watch worthwhile and self contained animation/anime.

I'm going to pick this up if I see it for a reasonable price and would watch it more than once.

The Barbecue House "Oldest Restaurant in Nacogdoches since 1959"

I figure since we live here now I had better do some restaurant reviews/impressions/whatever. First out of the gate is The Barbecue House. The sign says "BBQ House" so I don't know what the hell that is about.

Maybe it was because we went on an off day but I can't say that I was impressed. The beans were great but maybe it's just me - when I want BBQ I want brisket, sausage, turkey, chicken, and pork. Sure some slaw and some beans or some potato salad so I just don't have a massive pile of meat to feed on.

The brisket was okay, kind of dry, standard brisket. The sausage was pretty unimpressive. The turkey and chicken were good and the sides were pretty damn good. The slaw was a little mayonaisse-y but was a'ight.

They do have sandwiches that may be good. I don't know if they are any good and if I'll be back to try them.

About the sauce. There's much debate about sauce in BBQ: Sauce? No Sauce? Sweet? Vinegar? Thick? Thin? Slathered? Dry? Spicy? Smoky? The Barbecue House has pretty weak sauce. It's sort watery and doesn't have any particular goodness to it. It strikes me as a fairly generic flavor. Combined with average - at best - meat you have a real meh experience.

Fortuately there are still several BBQ joints in town to check out.

The Eye (2008) dir. David Moreau

The Eye was one of those movies that I downloaded - legally - because it was a horror movie to watch. I've often wondered why horror fans will watch crap. I think it's because most of the time there's no choice. We just want to watch a horror movie.

The Eye is not terrible. In fact it's actually perfectly reasonable - for a Lion's Gate movie. It's got some scares and it's directed/cinematographed pretty well and Jessica Alba is Jessica Alba.

The only real problems with the movie are with the story and characters. That is if you're paying any attention at all. Parker Posey shows up as Jessica Alba's sister. Whenever Posey shows up in "regular" movies I always have a moment of confusion. I want to yell, "the Christopher Guest movie is that way!"

The Eye isn't really worth watching unless you really need a movie to watch. Jessica Alba looks normal without make-up (but still is awesome) and she pretty much carries the whole movie.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008) dir. Guillermo Del Toro

Hellboy II: The Golden Army is awesome when Del Toro is allowed to go apeshit and do what Del Toro & crew do best - dark fantasy the likes of which Terry Gilliam only dreamed of. The rest of the movie is pretty stupid and funny. I don't mean funny I laughed. You'll either enjoy this or you won't.

I love Del Toro. To me this is just one movie closer to At the Mountains of Madness.

Okay folks - time for feedback.

Since I have some time on my hands I figure it's time for an overhaul of the site. So if you guys would please tell me what you like, what you don't, suggestions for design, ease of use, etc., etc., etc. then that would be dope. I promise to no longer use the term "dope". I reserve the right to use "fresh".

I would also like to know wether or not you guys would like one giant post page or seperate pages for different posts i.e. food/blog/movies.

HYR also has a few new links and gewgaws on the side bars. You can review the site on blogged.com. I also have a handy dandy subscribe button over there on the right - see? there it is! That way you can RSS HYR and get all the FYI you can shake a BFG at.

The banners for the webcomics look like smashed ass. I know. I am working on that...after I drink this cup of coffee and smoke another cigarette.

Thanks for the help. Hope to hear from you.

By the by I am working through emails and assorted correspondance - at a lazy snail's pace - but I hope you are all well and not dwelling in the Hell of the Upsidedown Sinners.

WTF movie news.

Saw today these interesting pieces:

1. Tarantino is actually going to make Inglorious Bastards after all. Part of me is excited but most of me is waiting for Tarantino & the Weinsteins to turn it into a three part movie. P.S. I'm still waiting for a single volume Kill Bill you pricks.
2. Someone still thinks they are going to make any money making an Elfquest movie.
3. A remake of Hellraiser. Huh. Y'know if it was done right it could work. Personally I'm a Hellraiser II fan - I enjoy Hellraiser as well. Now if they decide to remake Hellraiser with hillbillies and shitkickers then I would be very happy. "We'll tear y'all's souls apart! Woo!"

This sums it up pretty neatly.

Thanks to Zach for sending me this article: "Area Man Makes It Through Day"

Editorial about GTA IV.

Junot Diaz has written an excellent editorial for the WSJ about GTA IV.

Funny Games (2008) dir. Michael Haneke

Funny Games (2008) is a movie you are either going to love or hate.

Personally I fucking hated this movie. I was so pissed off after watching it that it took me the rest of evening to not be pissed off. The original might be better but it will take a miracle for me to watch it.

I'm not even particularly sure why I hated this movie so much. It should have been a movie I enjoyed: a taut psychological thriller, a twisted home invasion, a turn of the camera on the viewer, holding up a mirror to show the audience that it's as blood thirsty and psychotic as the home invaders, dark humour, and a scathing denouncement of the fantasy life that the idle wealthy live. Perhaps Haneke's Funny Games (1998) hit these marks but his adaptation for the American Art House market failed miserably. For every moment that worked there were several that didn't. (2008) begins well enough and the pace works. There's an early moment of Watts in her Pottery Barn weekend country house kitchen, preparing dinner, chatting on the phone that is very well done. The sense of dread, of impending doom is excellent and there is no jump scare to spoil it. In fact I was enjoying the movie up until the home invasion really kicks in. Then it becomes a smug, smirking, self conscious, pretentious, and predictable let down.

Part of my anger was directed at everyone in the movie. The bad guys were a leering pair of Patrick Bateman knock offs. The family were useless upper class twats. They waste time trying to use their cell phone. The list of aggravations goes on.

Maybe I would have enjoyed this movie if it had come out in the days of Man Bites Dog. One critic called Funny Games (2008), "Funny Games is an art house Hostel -- it mistakes self-consciousness for intelligence." Personally I think David Edelstein's review makes the most sense to me.

LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures

LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures is exactly what you'd expect from the LEGO Series of games. Good nostalgic fun through an "E for Everyone" filter. If you have played any of the LEGO Star Wars then you'll know what I mean: goofy humor, fun level design, great secret characters, and revisiting classics in a way that breathes fresh air into them. Also Original means "A game based on the movies that didn't suck."

I enjoyed LEGO Indiana Jones more than I enjoyed the Star Wars installments but that's because I was always more of an Indiana Jones fan. The game revolves around the first three movies and visits familiar sites, characters, and John Williams' cues. The game play is pretty straight forward though there were a few points where I got stuck and had to say bad words. There are a lot of achievements to be had with the 360 version - I just don't know if care enough to chase down the rest of them. I am missing one last secret character but at this point there's not much point besides completion's sake.

There are a few downsides - minor complaints really.

1. This is a complaint against all the LEGO series - your camera angles for platforming at times suck. Trying to jump onto a ledge that seems to be spot on but falling to your death - repeatedly - is annoying as shit. Granted this is a much more forgiving platformer/puzzle game than games in the past but still being hindered by the camera is getting to be unforgivable in this day and age.
2. Unless you are a recreational gamer/are going to play this with your kids on game night/play twenty games at once or have a life don't buy this game for full price. This one is a weekend rental.
3. Vehicle control is a nightmare or if not a nightmare then a pain in the ass. It's not intuitive and there were many times I ended up spinning around in circles or zooming off a Spielberg cliff.

I have to say that this is a fun game and I thoroughly enjoyed it. There is a lot of style in the details. The character animations are pretty clever and varied. Henry Jones Sr. keeps hold of his hat when he runs and after putting down heavy items rubs his back - you practically hear the "oof". There are plenty of moments that I found myself quoting the movie - usually the next line in a scene. I once said, "This is intolerable!" after failing a jump. Free Play is a lot of fun after finishing a level. If I had kids I'd totally play this with them.

James Bond and The Modicum of Respite

Thanks to Mike for sending this along. Woo! Daniel Craig! Woo!

"Well turn it up man!"